To understand the human mind | Friday, October 28, 2005
To be able to understand the human mind is a tough nut to crack. Not being able to understand or rather trying to guess and assume something is also something worth debating abt. The misunderstandings and finger accusing part of our lives are so sickly involved and there sseem to be just no reasoning or rather i am unable to project something to resolve or you would want to say to explain the unexplainable. Is there rreally a reason to everything? Is there not? If so then y cant i? isnt stupid or silly or wat? WHo are we upon to judge again? Once again who are we to assume?
1) TO know when u are assuming or not to. To try to understand the pp ard you and be sensitive towards what they feel then u will get further and further and then make a big headache out of urself. The most difficult part is to not to be bothered by the fact that you are being bothered and also to try to not be smthing that you do not wish to be or rather try and be the person u are not to be when circumstances change. Then again, no right no wrong, just who is able to think more for the other or rather, who is able to not to be bothered by the other.
2) So how does it feel like to not know if anyone is deliberately trying to insinuate you or just playing a fool? how we know? Y do we assume then? How shld we response? I have no answer to that. Full stop.
3) Trying to know urself. When pp starts to say they know u, then u really wonder do they? U dun even know urself so does the receiver deems the best for you. Once again we touch the idea of the assumption. Are we right to do that or wrong to do that?
I always believed in my instincts to make the friends and most of the time its does help. There is a sense of belonging to a grp or smone the moment you meet the person, although it might be wrong most of the time i believe everyone has the same feeling. Again, when everyone has the same feeling, they start talking abt the weirdos, so who determine the weirdos? US, its us...and that has become part of the society. We, the ones who decide to be the leader, the ones who decides on freedom and democracy and yet we are nvr pleased coz we cant nvr please everyone. When one tries too hard, it backfires. When one is not gd at something it demoralises and then leads to depression. (depending on how strong a person is) When u start to be of some material and be gd in something, the tendency to be arrogant and proud is always the case. The attention is there and pp recognizes you. Pp say they wouldn't like that but in the end they all love it. The effects of human reversing their own psychology? I do not know.
Even at times, i only care abt myself. When i dun speak, it doesnt mean i dunch know and when i disagree, it doesnt mean u suck. Most of all, being the kind of person i was brought up, i just simply think too much about everything and give everything too much thought be it the right direction or wrong, positive or negative.
4) To accept what is and whats not? TO be egoistic abt yourself and think you are the right one all the time? The way to speak, the tone , the expression..its all part of the truth of ourselves. Once you can start acting, then that's the most fake person i will ever see. The truth will come to light and things will fall back to its place. That is where retribution starts and you;ll see the thing u do happening to urself and wonder and see yourself in a different light.
I wasn't a lucky guy from birth. I dun own anything, i cant own anything, all i can is to dream. What my dreams are, millions or billions are thining the same thing. Phrases have become such a cliche to me.
5) Be more oblivious to your surroundings if anyone were to read this. It has become irritating to live and be fake ard the pp you see. At the same time, if u had to freaking think all the time to be careful of everything, then that will be too tired to carry on life the normal way. Stop assuming and start confirming. Stop talking abt things and start doing action with ur ideals and beliefs. Stop making pp think that they are an idiot or stupid. Stop the insinuation and stop thinking of others as a target for you to achieve some dumb goals and some slave. Get a life. Your life isnt by urself. Its about other but yet at the same time have the decency to act as you deem fit but with the expense of thoughts for others.
Freaking pissing days of my lives.
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Created at 7:20 am
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7 weeks more to end of IA | Wednesday, October 26, 2005
These few weeks have been a very weird week indeed. Many things happen and pass and it just seems like time has pass by so slowing by all the things that is happening. I’m enjoying myself here in Japan. I dun wan to work anymore these days. I’m losing the motivation to work recently and it seems like ggin to work these days seems more like a chore to me. Every Wednesday I have to wake up early and then go to work early coz I am in charge of the meeting materials so I am like the meeting materials guy there and still have to do the minutes. Y leh? I also dun understand but just do lah. Not very difficult what. Haha…just complaining lar. Another 6 more weeks and then I’ll be free from all these. Might just go to Tokyo for the end of the year trip instead only and Yokohama is of coz nearby. Then I will be back back to home sweet home.
Recently a spade of events happen and my friend broke his arm. Never broke but dislocated his elbow in a soccer game. Dunno y he so pia but then again, haha he injured his arm now cannot play soccer for some time le. It was a bad dislocation. Some more he didn’t buy any insurance. That day was a bad day as we only entered the field only for like 5 mins then out le. SO worried abt him and abt the $ problem. But luckily, Mazda belongs to ford and in the end he got some privilege to pay at a lower price.
Next thing that happened just a couple of days back that really made my mood so so bad…..is that I accidentally broke my friend, the same guy who has dislocated his elbow. I really felt so bad I couldn’t sleep well and stuff and then from then on it was feeling bad all the way but now hopefully I can get a temporary monitor so that he can use his laptop and ‘dong’ until all the way back to Singapore and then I’ll pay the cost for repairing for his laptop LCD screen. Hopefully not so much lar. Need to save money since now almost confirmed that i will be ggin to New Jersey for the Work & Travel USA during the holidays of semester 2. Felt a little weird that I am ggin to the US but also happy at the same time. It is definitely an experience and I would want to experience that but at the same time dunno why, it just didn’t felt that good as when I was chosen to be in Ford Motor Company.
Speaking of that, last week was the interview for the new interns and we got some of the funniest replies I could ever get. There was this guy that say that he liked Mazda cars especially the new Mazda RX-7…hahahaha. So funny, that like saying ‘I like mazda cars especially the Honda Type-R hahah!!!’ Ford is in Mazda and now they do not have a new RX-7 hahahha, The newest model is the Miata MX-5 hahahahhaaha……and the one closest to RX-7 is RX-8 which is comparatively new..ahhahahaha. My goodness…so crappy. The only RX-7 that I can think of is the Japanese anime Initial D where seisuke buang his RX-7 and changed a new body kit and come to think of it, its not even new..wahHWHAHAHHAHHA. I just cant stop laughing and this shit.
Unfortunately, there is this one guy Elvin who was selected and I really disliked him in the army. I hope he doesn’t get it. A marist also, those boys school…cheg… Coincidentally, one my NTU friend got the interview also haha..happy for him lar. Suay suay, they can only choose up to 2 or 3 interns…If 2 I really feel sad for them haha. Jialat. If they Buay Gam then Hong Gan liao, they can kiss goodbye to enjoying their trip…wahhahahaa….sounds funny lar but then haha…sad for them also. These things really do happen, just seem to happen too much between humans. Its really difficult to live with strangers and sometimes they really tend to mistaken nothing for something. Then quite bad but sucks la…..dunno y also but since they like it then dun care la. I just want to live my life man. Want to make it even more happening. Dun need others to know what I do, as long as I’m happy doing what I am doing :) ..Hee...Right, dear?
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Created at 4:32 pm
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Profile
Name: Paul Lee Age: 23 DOB: 20th Dec 1982 Email: gose21@hotmail.com (No Junk Please!)
I am very simple minded la. Loves to slack, have fun, sleeping and play games are my pasttime hobbies.
Highly ambitious but dunno whether if i can live up to my own expectations. Tend to be wary of people whom i dunno.
Sometimes super unfriendly, Lack things to talk to pp but can crap la but thats not a talent k. Now Mildly pessimistic.
I love cars, fast, sporty, wings, side skirts, carbon fibre, big 17" tyres. Whoohoo. Wish to own my own Ferrari one day.
Not model car k? ANy kind souls please. Hee. CHeers to all who read my blog. Thanks for looking. Haha :). Bleahz
Loves
Loves Myself
Loves all kinds of Cars
Loves to Slack
Loves Soccer
Loves to DAYdream
Nothing beats having good friends(Real gd friends)
